I am 33 years and four months old, and I just started a new job, broke up with my boyfriend*, and moved into a one bedroom apartment with my two dogs. That reads like the beginning of a novel with high heels and a bouquet on the front, doesn't it? 'Emma thought she had it all together, and then everything changed in the blink of any eye. Can Dumbface, the guy who is probably from work that she probably thinks she hates because that's how these things go, make her world whole again?'
You know what makes my world whole?
Repeated watchings of Melissa McCarthy movies (especially Heat, can that movie get some more love like RIGHT NOW??? I made my mom and brother watch it and I'm pretty sure they weren't just laughing because I was threatening violence if they didn't). Also Bachelorette which I am slowly coming to believe is better than Bridesmaids. Also, Heathers. Because if you want to fuck with the eagles, you have to learn to fly.
(Ok, yes, there are other things. Dogs, friends both new and old, family, etc. But Mel and the Sands (that's what Melissa McCarthy and Sandra Bullock will like me to call them when we all start hanging out), that girl from Party Down who's name I can't currently be bothered to google, and old, crazy-ass Christian Bale are pretty solid.)
*I'm worried this sounds sad. It isn't. Crockett and I are hanging out, all is well with the universe, I LOVE my new job so much that people are getting tired of hearing about it.
** The chicas say hi all. This was Easter, mom and dad were over, and I think I was doing math because I LOVE MY NEW JOB.
***There very definitely is no Dumbface at work.