Colorado. Runner. Yogi. Fucking hilarious, like, 17% of the time.

pee sensor

I think my pee sensor might be broken.

By pee sensor, I mean the little strip inside your bladder that they designed to emulate the little strip inside a gas tank. You know, the one that tells you when you're full up or running on empty. (You know - 'them'. The designers of body parts.)

What? Is that little strip not a real thing?

Ok, I see where you're coming from. Bladders are not gas tanks. They've been around longer, for one thing. If anything, gas tanks were based on bladders rather than vice versa.

But still, there's clearly something going on in there that tells you when you need to pee, right? It might just be a pressure thing, I guess. When you start to fill up, your bladder skin starts to stretch and then a 'hey we're stretching cause of pee' message to your brain, and then you start to plan your next bathroom trip. I guess.

My college did not offer any courses in biology.

Not that that's clear from what you read above.

Anyway, you know how when you're going downhill (or uphill, depending on the design of your car), it looks like you have less gas than you have? My route to school is very very hilly, and when I'm running low, my gas light will flicker off and on the whole way there.

My bladder is clearly on an uphill slant.

I don't have to pee, don't have to pee, don't have to pee.... HAVE TO PEE RIGHT NOW DEAR LORD IN PEE-PEE HEAVEN.

It's terrible.

I wonder where they sell new pee sensors. Probably not in the automotive section of Target.

I bleed

things that other people do poorly