Colorado. Runner. Yogi. Fucking hilarious, like, 17% of the time.

I'm rubber you're glue

Scene - last night, our kitchen Me: Look, the screen on my phone cracked. I don't know what happened! This is why I can't have nice things.

Crockett: Did you sit on it?

Me: ... Did you just call me fat?

Crockett: (walks away)

Waa waa wa wa waa waaaa

computer science is for nerds